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    $16.29 list($23.95)
    1. Down Came the Rain : My Journey
    $13.57 $12.88 list($19.95)
    2. How Full Is Your Bucket? Positive
    $15.64 $13.99 list($23.00)
    3. Change Your Life in Seven Days
    $9.71 $7.91 list($12.95)
    4. The Four Agreements: A Practical
    $11.16 $8.27 list($13.95)
    5. Codependent No More: How to Stop
    $16.29 $14.80 list($23.95)
    6. One Nation Under Therapy : How
    $65.41 $57.93 list($84.95)
    7. Family Therapy : An Overview (with
    $17.13 $15.35 list($25.95)
    8. Against Depression
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    9. The Language of Letting Go (Hazelden
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    10. Emotional Intelligence : Why It
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    11. The Art of Happiness: A Handbook
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    12. The Emotional Intelligence Quick
    $10.36 $6.95 list($12.95)
    13. Being Perfect
    $40.00 $38.32
    14. Motivational Interviewing, Second
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    15. Boundaries
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    16. Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
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    17. The Verbally Abusive Relationship:
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    18. An Unquiet Mind : A Memoir of
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    19. Skills Training Manual for Treating
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    20. Approval Addiction : Overcoming

    1. Down Came the Rain : My Journey Through Postpartum Depression
    by Brooke Shields
    list price: $23.95
    our price: $16.29
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1401301894
    Catlog: Book (2005-05-03)
    Publisher: Hyperion
    Sales Rank: 612967
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    Book Description

    In this compelling memoir, Brooke Shields talks candidly about her experience with postpartum depression after the birth of her daughter, and provides millions of women with an inspiring example of recovery.

    When Brooke Shields welcomed her newborn daughter, Rowan Francis, into the world, something unexpected followed-a crippling depression. Now, for the first time ever, in Down Came the Rain, Brooke talks about the trials, tribulations, and finally the triumphs that occurred before, during, and after the birth of her daughter.

    In what is sure to strike a chord with the millions of women who suffer from depression after childbirth, America's sweetheart Brooke Shields shares how she, too, battled this debilitating condition that is widely misunderstood, despite the fact that it affects many new mothers. She discusses the illness in the context of her life, including her struggle to get pregnant, the high expectations she had for herself and that others placed on her as a new mom, and the role of her husband, friends, and family as she struggled to attain her maternal footing in the midst of a disabling depression. And, ultimately, Brooke shares how she found a way out through talk therapy, medication, and time.

    Exhibiting an informed voice and a self-deprecating sense of humor, this first memoir from a woman who has grown up before the eyes of the world is certain to attract the attention and empathy of many new mothers and fans alike. ... Read more

    2. How Full Is Your Bucket? Positive Strategies for Work and Life
    by Tom Rath, Donald O. Clifton
    list price: $19.95
    our price: $13.57
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1595620036
    Catlog: Book (2004-08-10)
    Publisher: Gallup Press
    Sales Rank: 427
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    Book Description

    How did you feel after your last interaction with another person? Did that person-your spouse, best friend, coworker, or even a stranger -fill your bucket" by making you feel more positive? Or did that person "dip from your bucket," leaving you more negative than before? The number one New York Times and number one Business Week bestseller, How Full Is Your Bucket? reveals how even the briefest interactions affect your relationships, productivity, health, and longevity. Organized around a simple metaphor of a dipper and a bucket, and grounded in 50 years of research, this book will show you how to greatly increase the positive moments in your work and your life-while reducing the negative. Filled with discoveries, powerful strategies, and engaging stories, How Full Is Your Bucket? is sure to inspire lasting changes and has all the makings of a timeless classic. ... Read more

    3. Change Your Life in Seven Days : The World's Leading Hypnotist Shows You How
    by Paul McKenna
    list price: $23.00
    our price: $15.64
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1400082870
    Catlog: Book (2005-03-22)
    Publisher: Harmony
    Sales Rank: 1277
    Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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    Reviews (4)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Great book that will really make you think!
    So many of us were lied to as we grew up.Victims of childhood abuse may have been told they are worthless or unworthy of love and success.Change Your Life in Seven Days will help those people become reconditioned and understand that we are all born to lead happy, successful lives.

    Hypnosis, meditation, doesn't matter what we call it.The information in this book will give the reader a new way of thinking and the ability to see herself as worthy, lovable, and unmask one's true potential.

    Suzannah L Crowder
    Author, Damaged Goods: Adults Can Heal from Childhood Trauma

    5-0 out of 5 stars A very helpful book
    This book is filled with really useful checklists, exercises and good stories which helped me to actually use what I learned. The book did change my life. Nothing unrealistic but I've made a clear change for the better based upon his encouraging advice and amazing mind-control techniques presented in the book. I would say it could help anyone who follows the information presented to make at least a small, significant shift that is a bargain for $15.

    Another new book I recommend that helped me a great deal recently is "The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book"

    5-0 out of 5 stars Many will find this book helpful and enlightening
    I am always a bit leery of self-help books especially ones that make wild claims. However this is not your typical self help book.
    Although many of the techniques elucidated in this book have long been known the presentation of how to employ these techniques is quite good. It is a book that I believe anyone can follow and use.
    McKenna has been employed by the rich and famous to help them. Let him help you.
    Speakingfrom my own scientific background as a psychology major who did his graduate work in neuroscience (Princeton) and animal behavior (Max Planck Institute in Germany)I see nothing in this book that runs contrary to what science knows about how the mind works.
    This is not a "new age fad" and the author explains this by giving a brief history of hypnosis in both its use and misuse.
    One of the great living Tibetan Buddhist lamas would continue to ask his pupils "where is your mind?" It is a question that is not as simple to answer as you might think if you reflect on it. I will rephrase by asking "are you driving your mind or is your mind driving you?
    McKenna's techniques are sound and should help the reader get out of negativebehavioral loops into which we all often fall.
    There is nothing sinister about self-hypnosis. It is one of the ways our mind works. Whether or not we are aware of it we are haphazardlyself-hypnotizing everyday. This book shows you how to take control of the process.
    Those still in doubt after reading this review should check out other books on hypnosis by McKenna. This man is no "flash in the pan".
    Read it and be helpless no more.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Even Small Changes Can Make A Huge Difference
    Over the next 7 days you can make small changes that will make a huge difference in your life improving your happiness, success, and your well-being for years to come. The author has helped millions of people to quit smoking, lose weight, increase their self-confidence, cure phobias, and greatly improve their self-image.

    Paul McKenna has studied many highly successful and effective people and discovered that their success and happiness are not just accidents of good luck that happen to some people and not to others. Their success and happiness are created by deliberate ways of thinking and acting - such ways that are available to you, the reader, to follow. The author presents to you the core strategies and techniques of the most successful persons into a life makeover that you can use to think and act more positively and confidently. You will noticeably improve your life, amazingly so, in as little as one week.

    We are all "brainwashed" by our negative life experiences which affect our lives in terrible ways. For many of us our self-confidence has been broken down and damaged. We need new loops and new thoughts in our brains. Our self-images can be repaired and improved as is necessary. I strongly recommend this book. It can change your life.

    ... Read more

    4. The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
    by Don Miguel Ruiz
    list price: $12.95
    our price: $9.71
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1878424319
    Catlog: Book (1997-11-01)
    Publisher: Amber-Allen Publishing
    Sales Rank: 196
    Average Customer Review: 4.23 out of 5 stars
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    Sit at the foot of a native elder and listen as great wisdom of days long past is passed down. In The Four Agreements shamanic teacher and healer Don Miguel Ruiz exposes self-limiting beliefs and presents a simple yet effective code of personal conduct learned from his Toltec ancestors. Full of grace and simple truth, this handsomely designed book makes a lovely gift for anyone making an elementary change in life, and it reads in a voice that you would expect from an indigenous shaman. The four agreements are these: Be impeccable with your word. Don't take anything personally. Don't make assumptions. Always do your best. It's the how and why one should do these things that make The Four Agreements worth reading and remembering. --P. Randall Cohan ... Read more

    Reviews (351)

    5-0 out of 5 stars No Hocus Pocus.
    So many "self-help" books are pure rhetorical tripe. Common sense, good manners, and sensible actions regurgitated. In "The Four Agreements," Ruiz does not break new ground but the simplistic and thoughtful nature of his message make this book a winner.

    Let's face it, experience and iteration (practice) will propel one toward their stated goals with certainty. To point, the four agreements, as simple as they may be, are tantamount to successful achievement of personal and/or professional goals:

    1) Be impeccable with your word - keep your word or your reputation will fail.
    2) Don't take anything personally - tough act to muster at times but possible (besides, its good for the soul).
    3) Don't make assumptions - those who assume will lose the benefit of fact and learning; check your facts--learn what is necessary.
    4) Always do your best - this is the most simplistic of the agreements but one that we all have a tendency, at one time or another, to allow to lapse; if you decide to undertake something, make it YOURS!

    So many people who read books such as this or "Who Moved My Cheese" (self-help genre) attempt to pick apart the conceptual nature of the message whether simple or complex. Certainly, many books of this ilk are not worth the paper they're written on but when you find a message that speaks to your intellectual being as well as your soul, you'd better listen. Riuz's message is poignant; follow these simple rules and create your own happiness.

    This isn't a "cure-all" book. If you read it without concurrent introspection, then you've done nothing more than read a short book espousing basic vitues. However, if one reads this book with an open mind and the congruous search for excellence, this will be a truly powerful experience. If one does not, then one has lost the message behind the words. Don't read the WORDS, absorb the MESSAGE!

    Jump in, both feet. You'll not be sorry.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Ancient wisdom for modern days.
    What a great book! "The Four Agreements" flows with a simplicity and honesty that caught my attention. I came away from this book feeling more at ease in myself. Perhaps the most powerful passage in the book for me was "Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive -- the risk to be alive and express what we really are." I hadn't looked at this idea before, and when I checked with myself I found it to be true. Miguel Ruiz's book does a great job of describing the process through which we lose sight of our true selves. After that, Ruiz outlines the four agreements you can make with yourself to have a fulfilling life. They are simple and powerful and they can make a a great difference in the quality of your life.

    Gladly enough, when I found this book on Amazon and read the reviews to check it out, I saw a review for another book which I bought as well. It is Ariel and Shya Kane's "Working of Yourself Doesn't Work: A Book About Instantaneous Transformation." This book is about having a magnificent life and nothing less. And while it seems too good to be true, I found that the three principles of transformation the Kanes talk about touched me so profoundly that I HAVE discovered my own magnificence. No kidding! Just by being in the moment, life becomes magical. By becoming aware of the mechanical behaviors that keep us out of the moment, we regain our original freedom. My work is easier and I feel more connected to the people in my life. Read this book and the presence of the Kanes will seep through and you'll feel how true and powerful their words are, and how deeply they care about people and about the often-missed possibility of living with immeasurable joy, wellness, relationship, and satisfaction.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Wonderful Agreements for Life
    This is a beautifully written book coming from the sincere and simple yet profound wisdom that will help many people if applied. I found this to be among the few books I have purchased where the solutions for humanity are filled with compassion, inspiration and expansive wisdom as well as compassion.

    4-0 out of 5 stars Good ideas..remedial delivery...
    I enjoyed the book, but it was very repetitive and a little simplistic. Lots nifty ideas with a few interesting metaphors and insights... The book doesn't provide many revelations (if any). It mostly serves to re-enforce what we already know is right and true. We've all heard a million versions of the ideas delivered in this book. Stuff like:

    "Say what you mean. Mean what you say"
    "Assuming makes an ASS out of U and ME"

    You get the idea... Read this book as a reminder. Read it to gain an alternate perspective. I would recommend it to anyone who is on a path to self-discovery. Remedial or not, the toltec perspective referenced in this book is a valuable one...

    One thing I've noticed about most of the negative reviews. They all seem a little bit angry. Perhaps too angry to be receptive to a book with such a positive spin...

    5-0 out of 5 stars Not Making Assumptions
    By implementing the four agreements into my daily life I have been transformed. I took back my power by being able to 'see' other peoples parasite when it was exposed to me. I have been handling every situation in my life now with one of the agreements. I also recommend reading Rat Race Relaxer: Your Potential & The Maze of Life by JoAnna Carey. ... Read more

    5. Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
    by Melody Beattie
    list price: $13.95
    our price: $11.16
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0894864025
    Catlog: Book (1996-07-01)
    Publisher: Hazelden Publishing & Educational Services
    Sales Rank: 681
    Average Customer Review: 4.68 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    recovery has begun for millions of individuals with this straightforward guide.through personal examples and exercises, readers are shown how controlling others forces them to lose sight of their own needs and happiness. ... Read more

    Reviews (76)

    As a counsellor with thirty years experience, I can assure you that, contrary to what at least one other reviewer has indicated, loving yourself is NOT easy for everyone. If life was that simple, counsellor's case loads would be much lighter and the world a much happier place.

    This book is an excellent starting point and great self-help book for those who are codependent. It is not simply a matter of "starting to love yourself," but a matter of going back through the years, generally to the formative years of childhood, and discovering why you have developed the need to be codependent. In other words, it helps to know where you came from before mapping a route to where you are going. I did find the book made considerable reference to drug and alcohol addiction. While that is a major form of codependency, it is not the only form, but others received less priority. For that reason, the book lost a star in the rating. "Codependent No More" is written in an honest, straight-forward manner; therefore, if it evokes anger or negativism in the reader, it is likely because the reader sees at least a partial reflection of themself in the book.

    Like any self-help book, the advice given only works if the individual is prepared to make long-term changes and has the commitment to work at the root of the problem. For those who are codependent to a minor degree, this book provides helpful insight on how to deal with the problem; however, if the problem is a more serious one, opting for professional counselling is likely still the best course of action. Often old habits are difficult to change on one's own. Freeing yourself from the chains of codependency can result in newfound freedom, peace of mind and a happier, less stressful lifestyle. I do recommend this book for the valuable information it contains.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Looking for how to change? Get this book.
    Many books have been written on growing up in an alcoholic or otherwise destructive house. While it is important as a first step to know how some of our bad habits and attitudes get developed (the "why"), it is CRITICAL to know the "how": how can we recognize them in ourselves, to challenge our faulty thinking, to implement healthy strategies for interacting with others (and ourselves). This book is fantastic in the whys and the hows. I suspect many of you who read it will say things out loud as you read as I did, such as "Yes!", "So true!", etc. when you see yourself in the descriptions she gives. I was so impressed with this book, immediately after I finished it I ordered "The Language of Letting Go": daily readings to help stay on the right track. I have gone to counseling, read books on cognitive therapy and several other self-help books, but this book is by far the most helpful. I finally GET IT: I didn't know I was codependent. This book helped me diagnose it, then provided prescriptions to facilitate recovery. Ready to change? Get this book.

    5-0 out of 5 stars The Real McCoy
    This is the one that started it all and changed the way we communicate, act and treat co-dependent relationships. The book was a breakthrough when it first came out, and it is still an invaluable resource and guidebook. Extremely helpful

    5-0 out of 5 stars Beattie is a Recovery Beauty!!
    This author is one of the most honest, insightful, and thoughtful writers in the world of recovery. I own a copy of each of her books. You are encouraged and blessed with each chapter. I refer to her codependency books frequently to remind myself what getting better is all about. Thanks, Melody!

    3-0 out of 5 stars Definitely Worth a Read
    I first came across this book as a recommendation (from a psychologist, no less) as to how to deal with an abusive relationship I was involved in. Like some of the other reviewers, it was painful at first to see myself described in the book. But it helped me to understand why I was attracted to addictive personalities, what attracted them to me, and how to eventually break the cycle. I certainly won't say that all of your problems will be solved with this book, but it is a step in the right direction. It certainly worked for me. ... Read more

    6. One Nation Under Therapy : How the Helping Culture Is Eroding Self-Reliance
    by Christina Hoff Sommers, Sally Satel
    list price: $23.95
    our price: $16.29
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0312304439
    Catlog: Book (2005-04-01)
    Publisher: St. Martin's Press
    Sales Rank: 526
    Average Customer Review: 3.0 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    Americans have traditionally placed great value on self-reliance and fortitude. In recent decades, however, we have seen the rise of a therapeutic ethic that views Americans as emotionally underdeveloped, psychically frail, and requiring the ministrations of mental health professionals to cope with life's vicissitudes. Being"in touch with one's feelings" and freely expressing them have become paramount personal virtues. Today-with a book for every ailment, a counselor for every crisis, a lawsuit for every grievance, and a TV show for every conceivable problem-we are at risk of degrading our native ability to cope with life's challenges.

    Drawing on established science and common sense, Christina Hoff Sommers and Dr. Sally Satel reveal how "therapism" and the burgeoning trauma industry have come to pervade our lives.Help is offered everywhere under the presumption that we need it: in children's classrooms, the workplace, churches, courtrooms, the media, the military.But with all the "help" comes a host of troubling consequences, including:

    * The myth of stressed-out, homework-burdened, hypercompetitive, and depressed or suicidal schoolchildren in need of therapy and medication

    * The loss of moral bearings in our approach to lying, crime, addiction, and other foibles and vices

    * The unasked-for "grief counselors" who descend on bereaved families, schools, and communities following a tragedy, offering dubious advice while billing plenty of money

    * The expansion of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from an affliction of war veterans to nearly everyone who has experienced a setback

    Intelligent, provocative, and wryly amusing, One Nation Under Therapy demonstrates that "talking about" problems is no substitute for confronting them.
    ... Read more

    Reviews (18)

    4-0 out of 5 stars An "A"for effort...but
    I confess, I could not finish this book. The first chapter is so laden with self-serving references that I got the feeling the authors were obsessed with gathering references in support of their case. It made for a very boring read. And I was also turned off by a self-serving, out-of-context quotation from Emotional Intelligence, a very thoroughly researched book. For my money, a far more insightful and readable look at the therapy cult is Tana Dineen's "Manufacturing Victims: What the Psychology Industry is Doing to People." I greatly enjoyed Sommers's "Who Stole Feminism?" and therefore was very disappointed in this book, which is inconsistent with her usual balanced, in-depth coverage. Nevertheless, I give it 4 stars because the subject is terribly important. The psych industry is, in fact, intent on establishing its authority to control our behavior, increase our dependence on its underqualified "helpers," and make authoritarian pronouncements about our inner lives.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A book that needs to be seriously looked at
    I believe that the review by Hara Marano, posted by another reader, misstates much of what the book has to say. Interestingly, the authors are not at all against psychotherapy per se. They are against a culture which medicalizes certain disorders so as to reduce the sense of individual responsibility for the choices that people make. At the same time, they are against a species of one-size-fits-all turnkey psychotherapy promulgated and administered by what I, for many years, have referred to as the "trauma mafia." This term may be unfair as many of these individuals are caring and well-meaning. Sommers and Satel maintain that many of these interventions are unnecessary and sometimes have unintentional negative effects in that they may interfere with help naturally present in community and psyche.

    Some reviews have mainted that trauma counselors, whom the authors criticize, no longer use those methods that the authors are critical of. Were this only the case! I would personally advocate a worldwide moratorium on the training of both trauma and grief counselors.

    As a psychotherapist, supervisor, and teacher with over thiry years of professional practice, I would say that a good part of my experience and that of my colleagues jibes with much of what the authors have to say. We fortunately did not see what we were told we would see after September 11. Many believe that PTSD is a relatively rare disorder which usually resolves without specific psychological intervention.

    Marano states cognitive behavioral therapy has been extensively studied and has been found to be as least as effective as medication for many disorders. But a closer reading of psychotherapy outcome studies leads us to interpret claims of effectiveness with the utmost caution. The same can be said about much drug research. Although the problems with this research are beyond the scope of what I wish to write about here,the literature is there for those who would like to review it.

    Any book that makes the leap from patterns of thought (e.g., the human potential movement) to gross issues tearing at the very fabric of society is bound to take some liberties and may not always apply so neatly. However, One Nation Under Therapy in my view is not glib, and is extensively documented. Whether what the authors call "therapism" weakens society is open to debate, but the authors make some important points which should not be ignored.

    It's unfortunate that some here have dismissed a thoughtful and coherent thesis on the basis of presumptions about the authors' politics. I think that one can safely let the message speak for itself.

    1-0 out of 5 stars School, Self-Esteem and the "Read World"
    It is instructive to occasionally remind oneself that this "real world" is neither real, nor the world. A few cursory flips through any basic anthropology book is enough to demonstrate that a hyper-competitive society is far from being the only society humans can build - or have built. It's also far from being the most efficient or effective society humans have built. As I said before, bands and tribes have worked perfectly well for millions of years. Civilization, on the other hand, has to grow and grow and grow until eventually there's no more land to farm and no more natives to slaughter and no more natural resources to exploit. Eventually, it must implode - and if the ever-increasing effects of peak oil are any indication, it'll be reaching that point fairly soon. To refer to this disastrous experiment as the "real world" is not only self-absorbed and eurocentric, it's also pretty damn stupid. But even stupider is wanting to prepare one's children for such a dysfunctional society.

    After all, I was taught in my fruity-tooty Social Studies class that humans create societies to improve their lives. So what kind of society forces people to abandon their most basic human needs and desires in order to better serve the system? What kind of society requires training young children to forget about their feelings and the feelings of others so they can single-mindedly chase material goods? Who actually benefits from this? Some people get more money, but who gets more happiness? Who actually gets to slow down and be human? If we created society to serve people, how can we excuse the fact that people must now serve society?

    Read the full review here

    4-0 out of 5 stars Not too Neanderthal
    I had heard that this was a biased right-wing conservative diatribe attacking the mentally ill and anyone who tries to help them.I started it preparing myself for a hatchet job, but found, slightly to my disappointment, much that was well-balanced and reasonable.
    The first chapters contained unverified statements about child psychology.such as "overprotected kids do not flourish." I'll leave the dodgeball issue to NASPE members.
    The accounts of Maslow and Carl Rogers and the encounter therapies of the sixties flog some dead horses (Maslow died in 1970 and Carl Rogers in1987).
    Chapter 3, from Sin to Syndrome, hits some easy targets in examples of psychiatric defenses in criminal cases, but is rather superficial. I'd agree with what they say about the management of pedophiles. I think they shortchange the possibility of abnormal brain chemistry leading to addiction, but they talk excellent sense about the brain imaging studies.
    Chapter four contains a useful summary of what is know about the course and therapy of bereavement.I'd recommend it to any student who doesn't have time to read Zisook("Biopsychosocial Aspects of Bereavement") or Parkes.The discussion of PTSD and its treatment is well informed and helpful. The evidence about support groups for medical illnesses is dealt with fairly. Perhaps it's an unfair shot but, after looking at the jacket photographs, one rather wonders about the authors' credentials for pontificating about combat veterans.
    Chapter five deals with the emergency psychotherapeutic response to disaster in scathing and nihilistic terms that are probably well justified but become repetitious after having made the well-worn observation that the usefulness of debriefing is questionable.
    I didn't find it highly readable.Maybe that's because it's not polemical and biased enough. It's largely made up of summaries of other people's writings and some of the best bits are quotations from others, such as the man offered bereavement counseling after the death of his 105 year old aunt.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Thank You For Not Sharing.
    Years ago I was enrolled in a psychology class in which I happened to be the only male present.On the first day, there were about thirty students arrayed at desks around a blackboard.The professor came in and introduced herself.Then she requested that each student say their name while "telling the class some details about yourself."When the procession reached me I said my name...and nothing else.The professor eyed me carefully.She then asked, "Won't you tell us something about yourself?"
    "No," I answered. "I don't get into all that stuff."

    Such expectations of personalization and sharing are now sadly the norm in primary, secondary, and higher education classrooms across the country.Requests to emote come from one's peers and associates and are more rule than exception.Reticence in meetings or events is viewed with suspicion.The value of being "A Quiet Man" man well have died with John Wayne.

    Our nation is under the thrall of a movement that exerts its loathsome and self-righteous influence upon us whenever we tug at a dog's leash or tell somebody that they should "toughen up."The name of this movement and belief system is therapism and its take over of America has displaced traditional values like resilience, drive, pride, and honor.

    For this reviewer, the most intriguing sections of the book concern our public schools which have become, in many ways, a loco therapistis for the country's children.To summarize the current situation, our primary and secondary institutions are presently expected to provide services which they are in no way qualified to offer.It is now believed by many professionals that bestowing students with a good education alone is not fulfilling our mission.They regard it as essential that we prepare pupils for every facet of life.The line between teacher and social worker is becoming increasingly blurred.

    The school as one stop well-being center is now accepted by many an educator.Obsessing about feelings and processing them is the height of chic. The posture of care makes others regard you as devoted, empathic and vested.Should one appear otherwise they will look like a bat-wielding Neanderthal.Exploring moods and student vicissitudes is cutting edge.It's right up there with using words like "modality" and "rubric."
    Should a teacher desire alienation, they would be advised to bring a copy of"Exploding the Self-Esteem Myth" into their building's faculty lounge and begin quoting from its pages extemporaneously.

    By practicing reticence and reserve in regards to their feelings and thoughts it seems that many of our ancestors lived unfilled lives.Yet, One Nation Under Therapy illustrates that the endlessly processing of feelings makes for pessimistic and dispirited obsessions-and little else.Through constant discussion, irritation can morph into rage.The evidence suggests that inhibition and repression can be more adaptive responses to grief and stress than blabbing your feelings to every passerby.

    How did such toxic views and practices arise? Sommers and Satel, in the chapter "Esteem Thyself", point in the direction of humanistic psychology and the works of Abraham Maslow and Carl Rogers.With the latter, his insistence that the quintessential question of life was, "Am I living in a way which is deeply satisfying to me, and which truly expresses me?" indicates just how shallow and narcissistic he desired his patients to be.On the left they might refer to such a solid link to therapism as "a root cause."On the right we might dismiss it with the commandment of "Get Over Thyself."Rogers saw schools as "personal growth centers" with nonjudgmentalism as their core requirement.As for Maslow, his theories were so vague and unfalsifiable that they left themselves open for misrepresentation and manipulation by thugs like Abbie Hoffman and Charles Dederich.Humanistic theory bares as close a resemblance to the truth as the fantasist political works of Noam Chomsky.

    We live in days when the saying "Be Strong" is equated with insensitivity and that appeals to bravery are an embarrassment to those who make them.There is only one thing that must be done; all of us must be as judgmental as possible.We should never excuse the immoral behavior surrounding us.Rather than minimalize and rationalize pathological acts on the part of the narcissistic, violent, or drug-addicted, our nation must embrace personal responsibility without qualifications.We should follow the advice that Don Imus gives the sick children on his ranch, its time to "Cowboy Up." ... Read more

    7. Family Therapy : An Overview (with InfoTrac)
    by Herbert Goldenberg, Irene Goldenberg
    list price: $84.95
    our price: $65.41
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0534556698
    Catlog: Book (2003-05-16)
    Publisher: Wadsworth Publishing
    Sales Rank: 62326
    Average Customer Review: 4.67 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    FAMILY THERAPY provides a balanced presentation of the major theoretical underpinnings and clinical practices in the field. By presenting an overview of traditional and evolving viewpoints, perspectives, values, intervention techniques, and goals of family therapy, Herbert and Irene Goldenberg provide current, relevant, practice-oriented content laying the foundation for students to become proficient family therapists. This edition reflects the Goldenbergs' commitment to providing students with not only traditional family therapy theoretical frameworks, but also the field's evolving models of practice. It is the complete resource for assisting students in mastering the many facets of family therapy. For this new edition, Michael White, founder of Narrative Therapy, has written a new foreword for the text. ... Read more

    Reviews (3)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Fantastic Introduction to Family Therapy
    As a student of Family Therapy I am keenly aware of the need to have first-class resources that utilize proven techniques and that are theoretically sound.

    This text by the Goldenberg's, I have been told, is a veritable classic. I can see why. The book is very logical in its layout and construction, with the authors eschewing jargon and therapy-speak for clear, lucid, and cogent language.

    I have come to learn that there is a world of difference between individual therapy, and family therapy. The Goldenberg's make sure that this vital distinction is clear to the reader, and they do so without pedantry.

    I would recommend this book as a resource or as the primary text for any graduate level family therapy course. This book is so comprehensive that it can stand alone, or be used to supplement your studies.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Introduction Extraordinaire to Family Therapy and its Models
    Purposed as a comprehensive survey of family therapy and its models, _Family Therapy: An Overview_ supplies both the historical development of its concepts and models as well as a survey and analysis of its most recognized proponents, the literature of the field, and recognition of current trends in research and practice.

    The book is structured in five parts: (1) Perspectives of Family Therapy; (2) The Evolution of Family Therapy; (3) The Basic Models of Family Therapy; (4) Evolving Models of Family Therapy; (5) And, Research, Training, and Professional Issues.

    The book also includes the following helps: (1) A Comparison Chart of Theoretical Viewpoints in Family Therapy; (2) A Comparison Chart of Therapeutic Techniques and Goals in Family Therapy; (3) And, the AAMFT Code of Ethics.

    The book is rich in relevant case descriptions, illustrative explanations, and comparative strategies, all made benefit to an initial survey of the field.

    The text is both informative and absorbing, citing research lead upon lead for the prospective pursuant student. An engaging and relevant resource for today's undergraduate courses in the field!

    4-0 out of 5 stars A classic text for intoduction to family therapy
    This is one of the oldest and most classic family therapy text. Many experienced counselors have benefited from previous editions of the book. I read it several years ago, and I am also the co-translator of the Chinese edition of this book (4th ed.). It took us a LOT of time in the translation process. Because the language is full of jargons and the sentences are very long. It's a bit difficult for non-English speaking people. However, it has some good points. First, it has almost everything a biginner needs to know about family therapy. Second, it includes updated information. For example, it now has a single chapter on cultural diversity and ethnicity, which is an important topic in this field. And the popular theories like narrative and solution-focused therapies are also included. One weakness is that many old and less-used approaches occupied much space only for their historical importance. Besides, some information on the chapter of research does not catch up with latest trends. Overall, I think it is suitable for introductory family therapy courses, especially at the undergraduate level. But I think it could have more clinical examples to more clearly depict the theories. ... Read more

    8. Against Depression
    by Peter D. Kramer
    list price: $25.95
    our price: $17.13
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0670034053
    Catlog: Book (2005-05-05)
    Publisher: Viking Adult
    Sales Rank: 105
    Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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    Written as an answer to the question, "What if van Gogh had been on anti-depressants," Against Depression manages to be more of an exploration than a polemic, regardless of its title. While author Peter Kramer (Listening to Prozac) expresses a definite opinion--that disease of any sort should be treated as effectively as possible--he manages to express sympathy along with frustration about the recurring idea that soulful creativity often goes hand-in-hand with depression. Without ever being dismissive or particularly angry, his writing makes his point abundantly clear after the first chapter: The pervasive idea of depression serving a creative purpose is preposterous, as well as highly damaging.

    While he draws from a number of recent studies on depression, the book is not meant to assist in the diagnosis or treatment of individuals, except in a very general sense. Instead, Kramer adds the findings of those studies into his thoughts on how patients modify medication doses for depression as they wouldn't for purely physical diseases, and looks into future possibilities of genetically modified stress hormone transmitters that could work to prevent a slide into chronic depression. In the arts, he examines the work of philosophers, painters and writers in relation to the reputation their personal lives have earned (critics and consumers alike believe that pain equals genius and lack of pain equals lack of depth). Adding Dineson, Bellow, Updike and Kierkegaard to the list headed by van Gogh, Kramer shows a variety of ways we live with the assumption that creative genius does not function without severe emotional strain.

    While he does include a few stories from a patient to illustrate specific treatments, most of the book is slow and thoughtful, without ever being dry or pedantic. Useful to families or individuals who have encountered depression, this book offers excellent support for anyone--creative genius or otherwise--who struggle to define their talents as existing separately from their illness. Jill Lightner ... Read more

    Reviews (4)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Captures the true experience of depression.
    This is, hands down, the best book I have ever read about the multifocal and devastating effects of depression.It is extremely well researched, thoughtful, and is exactly the book that is needed to dispel the erroneous notions that persist regarding depression.There is nothing at all charming or intriguing about depression.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A 10 Star Direly Needed Book!
    Peter Kramer did an outstanding job in presenting the debilitating effects of depression, how vital it is that this chemical imbalance is properly treated, and how society can relate to the depths of despair suffered by those who have gifted us with their genius while they endured suffering.

    This book would do well to be required reading for anyone that either is depressed, or is in a close relationship with someone that has this treatable disease. The societal stigma about depression is addressed prolifically and how people of the creative arts seek to overcome depression by pouring their heart and soul into their work. Make no mistake, depression is NOT a prerequisite for artistic or genius expression. It IS "the most devastating disease known to mankind" as eloquently accounted for in the personal stories of the lives of those who have suffered, without treatment. Kramer brings sanity to this often misunderstood disease, and his insights are direly needed.
    Along with this book, I would also highly recommend "Shortcut to Spirituality: Mastering the Art of Inner Peace" by Bob Gottfried, Ph.D., as the two books together would be a tremendous help to anyone that seeks to be free from depression, and have inner peace. They are both 10 Star Books! Outstanding!

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent Information!
    Thank you for a well-written and informative book.Against Depression gave me a deeper understanding of this debilitating problem.

    Suzannah L Crowder
    Author, Damaged Goods: Adults Can Heal from Childhood Trauma

    5-0 out of 5 stars Kramer does it again!
    In this new book, Kramer explores the findings from the latest important research on depression. From thoughts on how patients modify medication doses for depression as they wouldn't for purely physical diseases to future possibilities of genetically modified stress hormone transmitters that could work to prevent a slide into chronic depression, he takes the reader on an enlightening journey through what matters.

    Another new book I enjoyed immensely of late is called "The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book" ... Read more

    9. The Language of Letting Go (Hazelden Meditation Series)
    by Melody Beattie
    list price: $16.00
    our price: $11.86
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0894866370
    Catlog: Book (1996-07-01)
    Publisher: Hazelden Publishing & Educational Services
    Sales Rank: 1963
    Average Customer Review: 4.87 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    Reflecting on the core issues of codependency, Melody Beattie encourages readers to trust themselves on their journey to self-care.Each meditation is filled with the personal warmth and insight Beattie brings to all of her books. ... Read more

    Reviews (39)

    5-0 out of 5 stars A lifeline
    I'll admit it -- I read this book through a crisis and a time of life that saw transitions everywhere. And while I'm still reeling from pain, and disbelief of the events that have happened to me in the past few years, I am already so much better from reading this book.

    When I find myself tempted by defeating behaviors, reading one passage reminds me why I don't want to continue down that road any longer.

    The funny thing is, I never saw myself as a codependent or as an addictive person. It doesn't matter what type of turmoil you're going through -- this book WILL remind you of a better way of life.

    It truly is a lifeline. I keep a copy at work and am discovering I'll need one at home to. If you struggle with any type of negativity, this book can help remind you that it's really going to be okay.

    5-0 out of 5 stars The Language of Letting Go
    I have owned a copy of 'The Language of Letting Go' since its original publication in 1996 and am still finding it useful and pertinent to my daily living. I bought the book at a time when I needed some guidance and this book provided this and more. It has allowed me to understand that what I feel is both normal and natural and that I should not deny emotions and thoughts that inevitably surface.

    I have suffered from post-viral depression, stress from studying, loneliness and yes, co-dependency. Melody Beattie, in this book has helped me to realise that I shouldn't try to push my fears and needy emotions aside. Rather I have come to realise I should just let the feelings go, and realise I can't control everything in my life.

    I am still using the book, not everyday but when I feel I need to. Inevitably I find what I need in each daily meditation. This has always been a daily tonic to me.

    Recently I lent my book to a good friend who is going through a very rough time - She was involved in a bad car accident she was told she should have died in. Since that time she has suffered from an eating disorder and has tried to push her closest friends and family away from her, afraid that she could hurt us with her pain. I know this book has helped her enormously, she told me so. Now I'm buying one for her. I think this is probably the best gift I could give her.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Can't go wrong with this book!
    Written by the experts, it offers sound and invaluable advice on letting go and releasing yourself from co-dependency.

    5-0 out of 5 stars AUTHOR REVIEW - FIVE STARS
    The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie is an excellent tool for anyone who wants to work through the painful process of ending a relationship. I highly recommend this book!

    John D. Moore, MS, CADC
    Author of Confusing Love with Obsession

    5-0 out of 5 stars MIDWEST BOOK REVIEW
    Melody Beattie's book "The Language Of Letting Go" is a tender caring work of art.
    Gently she speaks to the spirit inside of us and lets us know that it is ok to be ourselves.
    Something most of us are not use to doing, something we need to be allowed to do.

    Her words are those of one who has tasted of the emotions that she shares and her advise is like sweet honey to the reader.
    Sometimes what we need is just someone to say, it's ok to be you! The author does this and more.
    A very well written meditation book that will soothe many that read the words between the covers of this work.
    Recommended! ... Read more

    10. Emotional Intelligence : Why It Can Matter More Than IQ
    by Daniel Goleman
    list price: $17.00
    our price: $11.56
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0553375067
    Catlog: Book (1997-06-02)
    Publisher: Bantam
    Sales Rank: 1136
    Average Customer Review: 3.89 out of 5 stars
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    There was a time when IQ was considered the leading determinant of success. In this fascinating book, based on brain and behavioral research, Daniel Goleman argues that our IQ-idolizing view of intelligence is far too narrow. Instead, Goleman makes the case for "emotional intelligence" being the strongest indicator of human success. He defines emotional intelligence in terms of self-awareness, altruism, personal motivation, empathy, and the ability to love and be loved by friends, partners, and family members. People who possess high emotional intelligence are the people who truly succeed in work as well as play, building flourishing careers and lasting, meaningful relationships. Because emotional intelligence isn't fixed at birth, Goleman outlines how adults as well as parents of young children can sow the seeds. ... Read more

    Reviews (157)

    5-0 out of 5 stars How to understand emotions and make the most of them
    I read this book in 1997 and was fascinated with the content, especially information about "flooding" ie. when we are emotionally overloaded and we can't respond effectively. I was also particularly interested in Dr. Goleman's research into the components of emotional intelligence -- self-awareness, impulse control, persistence, zeal and self-motivation, empathy and social deftness. Dr. Goleman explains what happens to us neurologically when we experience emotions and why emotional intelligence is important. After reading his book, I was left with questions such as, "What do my emotions mean? How do I deal with my emotions when they occur?" These questions are specifically answered in Optimal Thinking: How to Be Your Best Self by Dr. Rosalene Glickman. Dr. Glickman explains why and how each emotion is experienced, the messages they bring, and questions to ask yourself and others to best resolve emotions and achieve emotional mastery. In my opinion, these books belong in every family and in every workplace.

    4-0 out of 5 stars Why emotional intelligence wins out over basic intelligence
    This ground-breaking book proposes that emotional intelligence is a learned ability that is as much or more important than basic intelligence and should be part of our schooling just as reading, writing and arithmetic. The author sets out new scientific evidence showing, step-by-step, how healthy emotions and destructive emotions control our lives. Feelings often count as much as logic, and we have gone too far, says Dr. Goleman, emphasizing the purely rational, when emotions are so powerful.

    All emotions are an impulse to act; the creation of instant plans for handling a life situation. Now we know in detail how emotions prepare the body for differing responses. A human being is made up of two minds according to Goleman. One thinks, and one feels; two fundamentally different ways of knowing.

    The author defines emotion as "a feeling and range of propensities to act." The principal emotions are: Anger: Fury, outrage, resentment. Sadness. Grief, sorrow, cheerlessness. Fear. Anxiety, apprehension, terror. Enjoyment. Happiness, joy, delight, amusement. Love: Trust, kindness, devotion, infatuation. Surprise: Shock, amazement, astonishment. Disgust: Contempt, scorn, abhorrence. Shame: Guilt, embarrassment, remorse, humiliation.

    Various emotions have various physical effects on the body. Anger, for example, causes blood to flow to the hands; strong energy for vigorous action. Fear causes blood to flow to the legs making it easier to run. Happiness is a positive emotion that provides readiness and enthusiasm. Surprise makes it easier to figure out what's going on and create a plan of action. Sadness helps adjust to a significant loss and brings a drop in energy and enthusiasm.

    When emotions are out of control, the emotional mind takes over and swamps the rational mind. Emotions have a mind of their own and can hold views independent of the rational mind. Goleman names five main domains of emotional intelligence: (1) Knowing one's emotion (2) Managing emotions (3) Motivating oneself (4) Recognizing emotions in others (5) Handling relationships.

    A most important emotional lesson, of course, is anger management. As a culture, we have not bothered to make sure children are taught the essentials of handling anger or resolving conflict. These and other fundamentals of emotional competence have been left to chance, says Goleman.

    Surprisingly, the emotional mind is far quicker than the rational mind and springs into action without considering consequences that may prove to be mistaken or misguided. Scientific findings indicate we often cannot control emotions. What's more, the emotional mind takes its beliefs to be true, discounting evidence to the contrary. That's why it's difficult to reason with someone who is emotionally upset.

    A familiar husband-wife emotional story: Wives, it seems, are the emotional managers and as such, are more likely to criticize husbands. Men are more likely to be stonewallers. Wives try to bring up and resolve disagreements. Husbands, on the other hand, are reluctant to be drawn into arguments. As a wife sees her husband withdraw from a discussion. she increases the volume and intensity of her complaint white he becomes defensive or stonewalls in return. She becomes contemptful, frustrated and angry; the husband feels more and more an innocent victim. As husbands stonewall, the wife feels completely stymied. The author calls this psychological impasse "flooding~~ and points out that flooding escalates, often going out of control.

    There is ample evidence of growing emotional recklessness in the wortd, the author points out, and makes a strong case that it is critical to teach emotional competence to children as part of their education.

    4-0 out of 5 stars Significant topic, questionable presentation
    The importance of emotional intelligence was proven to me early on in this book, especially with the author's neurological explanations of the brain. Daniel Coleman used a variety of approaches to prove the importance of emotional intelligence including: neuroscience, biology, and case studies. Yet, some of the directions the author chose to take lost my interest. The case studies could have been abbreviated and maybe the classification of emotions could have been expanded on. The book demonstrated the dire consequences of not learning emotional intelligence and sometimes used extreme examples which seemed unnecessary. However, this pioneering book (albeit somewhat outdated) deserves attention.

    For me the book started well with references to Aristotle's "Nicomachean Ethics," making a connection between the wisdom that Aristotle exalted and emotional intelligence. The book went on to explain how the physical components of the brain affect emotional behavior; here the amygdala is explained, which is the control center for emotional behavior, and is referred to throughout the book. This biology and neuroscience clarified how rudimentary emotional behavior is in the human brain.

    In part three, the author showed progressive thinking in his belief that the medical profession must consider emotional factors. Since the book's publication, medical schools have agreed with him. On June 10, 2004, the Wall Street Journal reported that graduates from all 126 medical schools in the U.S. will take a standardized test that will rate "bedside manner." According to the article, this test will "gauge what multiple-choice questions cannot: a graduate's ability to communicate with patients..."

    In parts Four and Five my interest waned as the author discussed how emotional training can save society. Although the author suggests key improvements to pedagogy, the case studies and extreme examples of what can go wrong with the emotional brain belabored the topic for me. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is closely analyzed, as is trauma, abuse, and bullies - all valid areas for discussion but beyond what is needed for demonstrating what emotional intelligence is and why it is important. Violence, social aggression, and certain neuroses resulting from emotional problems could have been explained in a shorter section. But the author deserves credit for offering solutions, and has an interesting theory that modernity is the cause for a worldwide trend of melancholy.

    I would have liked more of the book devoted to the challenge of defining emotions. Of interest to me was Appendix A because it revealed the classification attempts made for emotions. The section considers a handful of "core" emotions with all other emotions being a blend of these; there also might be families of emotions with many nuances affecting moods and temperament.

    This book reveals a big-picture outlook of the human brain and the emotional activity that is an intrinsic part of it. The thesis that emotional intelligence can be more important than IQ is well supported, but the author is not saying that it is necessarily better! (Previous reviewers of the book have created an EQ-versus-IQ contest.) Both are critical facets of intelligence that must work together and neither can be dismissed.

    5-0 out of 5 stars You have to try the Emotional Intelligence PowerPoint!
    I bought the book along with the recommended Emotional Intelligence PowerPoint, which is just a terrific resource! It's a complete presentation on emotional intelligence (which saved me a lot of work) but the great thing is it plays movie clips right from the presentation to illustrate each of the emotional intelligence skills. My audience really grasped the concept and was entertained enough to give me 100% of their attention for the full hour. Really great!

    5-0 out of 5 stars Before it got crowded
    Most of the great industrialists had one thing in common; they were able to give credit where credit was due. This is a lost art in the management of humans in today's concentrated environment that depends upon statistics and numbers.

    No man or woman ever created a number that wasn't backed by the self discipline that enabled him or her to give the level of commitment that came with the desire to give that commitment. If they do, they fall upon deaf and dumb hearts, and are bound to be used for different uses than the ones intended.

    Passionate commitment is the only thing that ever changed a life, or lives, and the main thing that determines success that might be predictable. Without commitment, marriage fail, even if they appear to work. Without commitment, incentives are little help to the people trying to use them to create wealth, for themselves or for others.

    Negative commitment alway works worst to produce desirable outcomes because they never carry a reciprocal commitment to get the job done, and to do it well.

    The pride of passion and success is the single most important component of a job well done, and a job well loved, by which great things are made possible because of the commitment brought to the job, that is felt within, and rarely without the internal commitment that defines and fuels the task to be done, often with a sense of vision for accomplishment as well as for the harmony that enables teamwork to exist that relies upon it, as opposed to the tyranny that sometimes fuels efficiency and completion of tasks that may be unpleasant but necessary to be done.

    A positive outlook is essential to most quality jobs and often underestimated in its power to create powerful results. Among groups, failure to recognize credit where credit is due destroys more groups than not, and strains the ones where it is not present. Groups break down at varying levels, but almost always at the lower levels from the negligence of the upper levels to give that due credit, and to respect its presence as important to any organization. Failure is always a managerial negligence, and false rewards are immediately noticeable to the participants of any group because they deal daily with the results of performance that would be the criteria by which management determines successful performance to offer those rewards. Underlings usually know the score, and often better than management because of its isolation. Misplaced credit is as damaging to organizations as those where it is non-existent since it destroys not only faith but also integrity.

    Emotional IQ is far more valuable to the organization for this reason. Maintaining the integrity of the group is crucial to its success, and sometimes, to its survival. Faith is as asset to integrity, but only a part of what makes any organization valuable since better times can be managed, or sustained, during times of hardship, but integrity forms the heart of commitment for most who are associated with, and determine the vitality of the entire organization through bad times or good. There is no replacement when destroyed, either intentionally or accidentally, and few apologies are effective to heal those deep wounds. Relationship or relational discrimination is the distinction that makes the different in any organization, and those which cultivate the image of equity generally do equity. Those that don't suffer the effects of their lack of commitment by revealing their flaws, not only to insiders but also to outsiders. Emotional intelligence often relies upon intuition to determine its presence or absence. ... Read more

    11. The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living
    by Dalai Lama
    list price: $23.95
    our price: $16.76
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1573221112
    Catlog: Book (1998-10-01)
    Publisher: Penguin Putnam
    Sales Rank: 803
    Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars
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    Have you ever wondered what it would be like to sit down with the Dalai Lama and really press him about life's persistent questions? Why are so many people unhappy? How can I abjure loneliness? How can we reduce conflict? Is romantic love true love? Why do we suffer?How should we deal with unfairness and anger? How do you handle the death of a loved one? These are the conundrums that psychiatrist Howard Cutler poses to the Dalai Lama during an extended period of interviews in The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living.

    At first, the Dalai Lama's answers seem simplistic, like a surface reading ofRobert Fulghum: Ask yourself if you really need something; our enemies can be our teachers; compassion brings peace of mind.Cutler pushes: But some people do seem happy with lots of possessions; but "suffering is life" is so pessimistic; but going to extremes provides the zest in life; but what if I don't believe in karma? As the Dalai Lama's responses become more involved, a coherent philosophy takes shape. Cutler then develops the Dalai Lama's answers in the context of scientific studies and cases from his own practice, substantiating and elaborating on what he finds to be a revolutionary psychology. Like any art, the art of happiness requires study and practice--and the talent for it, the Dalai Lama assures us, is in our nature. --Brian Bruya ... Read more

    Reviews (279)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Counter to the negative reviews
    I have noticed several reviews that blast Howard C. Cutler for the way he wrote this book.

    I would like to say that I think he did a good job.

    As an enthusiast of Buddhism, I am inclined to agree that I would have liked to heard more from the Dalai Lama himself, but I understand that the intent of this book was to allow non-buddhists to learn to appreciate and to implement this marvelous system of Buddhist psychology in their lives.

    In some senses, Buddhism is a science of understanding and mending the human psyche. For myself, I already understood a lot of the principles in the book, but it was very nice to hear a western psychologist's viewpoint. Sometimes I get lost in the volume of material there is to read about the practice of Buddhism. There are many different approaches to Buddhist thought.

    This book is perfect for any non-Buddhist who would like to get a taste of the basic psychology derived from the teacings of one of the most brilliant men in history, The Buddha. The Dalai Lama is a wonderful man in his own right, and is a very wise and worldly translator of this complex system of thought. His profound and well thought out answers to the questions posed by Cutler reflect the depth of his understanding of the human condition and the remedies prescribed by the Buddha to end the suffering that we all must endure.

    The Dalai Lama does not give a full exposition of the Buddhist teachings on any of the subjects presented in the book, but his answers are profound and can be put to use in the daily life of any westerner who desires to be happy. Cutler is a reassuring figure in the book who is there to raise the questions that any westerner might raise. More importantly, he is there to compare and contrast the words of the Dalai Lama to the work of western psychologists and to confirm and even exalt the approach of the Dalai Lama.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent Guide To Happiness And Mental Health
    The Declaration of Independence asserts our self-evident right to pursue happiness, but doesn't teach us how to do so. The Dalai Lama says happiness is the goal of human existence and teaches us not just how to rid ourselves of the negative thoughts from which unhappiness springs, but also how to grow into an habitually positive frame of mind. This is not a selfish pursuit since compassion and altruism are understood as essential to personal happiness. In an age of road rage and air rage, depression and anxiety, such a guide to mental hygiene and growth is needed and welcome. I was initially disappointed that the book had two authors, but now consider this a strength. Dr. Culter not only adds western psychological information that complements "Buddhist" doctrine, but also provides good descriptions of the Dalai Lama, engages him in a running dialogue, and asks the questions that I would like to ask, particularly how a non-Buddhist would use the teaching just given. As it turns out there is very little in this book that is strictly "religious" or that would be unacceptable or impractical advice to a believer in another or in no faith at all. The Dalai Lama addresses himself specifically to such people. Obviously the book needs to be put into practice, not just read.

    4-0 out of 5 stars A good introduction to Buddhism and Dalai Lamas thoughts
    This is a good book to help you learn about the principles and ideas of Buddhism. Written for a Western audience, it takes up problems of daily life and how to be happy with the right mode of thinking. How to live a balanced, peaceful and happy life. Reading the book is easy. How to follow its teachings perhaps not that easy, but obviously worthwhile.


    5-0 out of 5 stars The Art of Happiness Explained By The Dalai Lama
    This is a thoroughly enjoyable book that is easy and interesting to read, understand, and most of all apply to your life.
    Here are a couple of quotes from this book that shed light on His Holiness The Dalai Lama's Views:

    P. 173: "The ability to look at events from different perspectives can be very helpful. Then, practicing this, one can use certain experiences, certain tragedies to develop a calmness of mind. One must realize that every phenomena, every event, has different aspects."

    "It seems that often when problems arise, our outlook becomes narrow. All of our attention may be focused on worrying about the problem, and we may have a sense that we're the only one that is going through such difficulties. This can lead to a kind of self-absorption that can make the problem seem very intense. When this happens, I think seeing things from a wider perspective can definitely help - realizing for instance, that there are many other people who have gone through similar experiences, and even worse experiences."

    When Howard Cutler questioned about dealing with anger, his question was: "...You might think about an event...even much later, and every time you think about it you become angry all over again. How would you suggest dealing with (this.")
    The Dalai Lama had this to say on P. 175: "If you look from a different angel, then surely the person who caused this anger in you will have a lot of other positive aspects, positive qualities. If you look carefully, you will also find that the act which has made you angry has also given you certain opportunities, something which otherwise would not have been possible, even from your point of view. So with effort you'll be able to see many different angles to a single event. This will help."

    By reading this book, you will gain a greater understanding of HOW to transform the difficulties in your life, by transforming your views of them. It will greatly contribute to your inner peace, as well as peaceful relations with others, along with how to deal with life's constant changes with calm and assurance.
    Highly Recommended! Barbara Rose, author 'If God Was Like Man'

    3-0 out of 5 stars FACT: Teachings in New Testament have Buddhist roots
    The book is ok .... I disagree with the retarded Christian from FL. It doesn't take a degree in rocket science to note that the Old Testament and the New Testament are of a completely different flavor. The Old Testament is full of fire and brimstone, an eye-for-an-eye kind of stuff whereas the New Testament has a distinctly Buddhist slant. Gee, I wonder if the fact that Jesus Christ spent several years in Tibet studying with the Buddhist monks had an influence on his teachings?!?!... ... Read more

    12. The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book: Everything You Need to Know to Put Your EQ to Work
    by Travis Bradberry, Jean Greaves
    list price: $19.95
    our price: $13.57
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0743273265
    Catlog: Book (2005-06-07)
    Publisher: Fireside
    Sales Rank: 1739
    Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description


    In today's fast-paced world of competitive workplaces and chaotic personal lives, each of us is searching for effective tools that can make our schedules, behaviors, and relationships more manageable. The Emotional Intelligence Quickbook shows us how understanding and utilizing emotional intelligence can be the key to exceeding our goals and achieving our fullest potential.

    Authors Bradberry and Greaves use their years of experience as emotional intelligence researchers, consultants, and speakers to revitalize our current understanding of emotional intelligence. They have combined their latest research on emotional intelligence with a quick, easy-to-use format and cut-to-the-chase information to demonstrate how this other kind of "smart" helps us to decrease our stress, increase our productivity, understand our emotions as they happen, and interact positively with those around us.

    The Emotional Intelligence Quickbook brings this concept to light in a way that has not been done before -- making EQ practical and easy to apply in every aspect of our daily lives. The Quickbook will help you to:

    • Engage the four unique areas of EQ: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management

    • Increase your EQ through the use of these skill-building techniques

    • Apply your EQ at work to develop leadership skills and improve teamwork, making you a better manager and a more desirable employee

    • Practice your EQ outside the office environment to benefit your relationships with loved ones, making you a better partner and parent

    • Access the link between your EQ and your physical well-being to improve your overall health

    • Measure your current EQ through access to the authors' bestselling online Emotional Intelligence Appraisal
    ... Read more

    Reviews (7)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Change in perspective - Merle Riepe, PhD, SilverStone Group
    As a self-admitted antagonist of emotional intelligence, I have always thought EI was a fad concept that would quickly pass. Because of this book, that has changed.The EI QuickBook brings a new, fresh perspective to the field...and does it swiftly! The stories are rich and effective and skillfully intertwined among theoretical and practical research on EI. If you read only one book on Emotional Intelligence...this is it.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Analyzing Emotional Intelligence
    We all know a lot of people who have let emotions rule their lives to their great detriment. These people leave their husbands and wives to marry another just like the one they left behind. They go through life with no idea of what happened to make their life so bad.

    Emotional Intelligence, as distinct from pure intelligence is something that sorta like the judge's ruling on pornography, "I can't define it, but I know it when I see it."

    This book describes EQ, what it is, how it works, what you can do to increase yours. It largely consists of stories, the results of the authors observations I suspect, that show where EQ (either high or low) has made a difference in a persons life.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Crucial
    Emotional intelligence is such a crucial concept to understand--yet so many of us are unaware of it. The authors do a magnificient job of explaining the incredible power of emotional intelligence and how to apply it to achieve your ultimate goals. This book was a great help to me and is an awesome success tool.

    5-0 out of 5 stars The Book of Choice
    While the concept of emotional intelligence has gained popularity in recent years, there has been a void of hands-on information suitable for audiences beyond the research community.The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book is the perfect solution:easy to digest, entertaining, and informative with plenty of take home value.This book has goodness of fit for both the business audience and the mass market of readers who seek to learn more about themselves and how they can improve their lives through an understanding of EQ.I particularly like the free assessment that comes with the book.I commend Bradberry and Greaves for this practical, groundbreaking book and will strongly recommend it to others.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Fabulous read
    This is the most thought-provoking book I've read in a long time. Without being simplistic, it introduced me to so many interesting things I could use to my benefit. Being intellectually smart is surely a strong advantage in our society, but it doesn't say nearly as much as your control and awareness over your own emotions. Have you ever wondered why you have emotions, how your brain works to process them, and how you can use them to your own advantage? I've never read a book that so clearly explains how it all works and what to do with it. ... Read more

    13. Being Perfect
    by Anna Quindlen
    list price: $12.95
    our price: $10.36
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0375505490
    Catlog: Book (2005-04-26)
    Publisher: Random House
    Sales Rank: 609
    Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars
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    Reviews (8)

    2-0 out of 5 stars Entire book could be written in one paragraph
    Charging $12.95 for a 64-page book that is essentially a commencement speech sprinkled with photos from the Fifties seems the ultimate in chutzpah.Although I love Anna Quindlen's columns and novels, this book warning about the displeasures of perfection is not worthy of hardcover treatment -- it should be one in a collection of essays.There is nothing here that has not not been said before, many times before by others, some even more eloquent than Quindlen.Save yor money and read the reviews -- you'll get the entire gist and more from those.

    5-0 out of 5 stars AMAZING
    This brief picture book contains an essay based on a commencement address by Ms. Quindlen.

    The basic concept of the essay is that a young person can get so caught up in meeting others' expectations . . . and doing so perfectly . . . so that there's no room left for the young person to be her- or himself. Instead, you become a perfect imitation of the current manias. Ms. Quindlen wisely warns that " . . . nothing important, or meaningful, or beautiful, or interesting, or great, ever came out of imitations."

    She warns that it's hard work being yourself. There's no model for you to follow. You have to face yourself and make the most of your imperfections.

    Ms. Quindlen also warns against the concept of "effortless perfection" that young people seek to portray. It's an oxymoron. Perfection is a great task and the goals are constantly being shifted for you. In addition, it's the imperfections that draw the eye and make the hand-made rug more appealing than the machine-made "perfect" one.

    To be human is to be imperfect. Revel in it!

    To me, the photographs were the best part of the book, and they would have reproduced much better if they had been on larger pages. I graded the book down one star for failing to do justice to the photographs.

    The book opens with a photograph of a young woman carrying an enormous briefcase on her back. It's a metaphor for the weight of carrying the need to be perfect in the world's eyes. The next photograph has six women in bathing suits at the beach. One is standing on her head while five similar-looking women pose in high heels with their arms around each other sitting on a rail. In the next image, two identically dressed females compare their shoes.

    There's a lot of humor in the images. You'll see bobby soxers, women walking with books balanced on their heads, a girl on stilts, a bride gaping as her veil flaps ahead of her in the breeze, three generations of women profiled, and lots of old-fashioned clothing . . . all of which were considered "new and perfect" at one point in time or another. You'll be giggling a lot over these photographs.

    There are also some romantic, idealized images to reflect the need to be yourself. Those will cause you to yearn for tranquility and satisfaction.

    3-0 out of 5 stars Perfect Is As Perfect Does.
    There is no such thing as being perfect, but try to tell that to young mothers.At one time or another, all women strive for perfection.Men are born perfect.Like the male birs who are the beautiful ones who must get the notice of the female, men don't have to fool with makeup, or worry about hairdos.If they're clean and don't overdo the after shave, most are perfectly groomed without trying.

    But with women, we get caught in "the perfection trap" not only with looking as good as we can but training little girsl that subterfuge is natural.What gets to me are all the old (really old) women who continue to dye their hair.I know one who werars two sets of eyelashes at the same time.I wonder who she plans to seduce, as more men look at me with my natural hair, no eye makeup and coverup foundation with lighter shades of lipstick.

    This is a book of pictures more than guidance.That of the old woman reading to her cat is the most perfect.The two girls dressed like we did back in the Fifties with books on their heads as they walk are almost perfect.The five swimsuit dressed girls in their high heel shoes sitting on the railing watching another do a head stand looked to be right out of the Forties.Maybe that was perfection back then.

    Anna says that "trying to be perfect may be inevitable for people who are smart amd ambitious and interested in the world and its good opinion.What is really hard and amazing if giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself."Well said.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Oh, the Pressure!
    What a relief this quick and easy to read, sweet and oh, so
    insightful book is.Anna Quindlen's style of writing is inviting.
    I immediately felt like I was chatting with a fascinating old friend
    with whom I had much in common.Anna writes about the pressure ambitious
    people tend to put on themselves to be perfect.Where good is not enough
    and the never-ending pursuit of perfection is chasing a moving target --
    she offers a simple solution.Using examples from her own life as well as
    literary allusions, Anna demonstrates her theory clearly and convincingly.
    Give up the struggle.At first it seems down-right un-American.Pursuit of
    happiness is our heritage.Anna tenderly lays out the possibility that the
    issue is the "running" itself.I highly recommend this book and offer further
    that perhaps you, too could use the break.I love the way that kindness to and
    with oneself could be a way of life.This book dovetails nicely with
    another one of my favorite books called "Working on Yourself Doesn't Work"
    written by Ariel and Shya Kane. The Kanes too offer an ease to living a life
    I hadn't known was possible before. Who knew that life could be gentle
    and exciting, smooth and fulfilling.What if we could still get the things
    we want but skip the pressure we put on ourselves over how long it's
    taking or how wrong or right we're doing it all?It makes for a life worth
    living.Like I suggested above, read them both Anna Quindlen's "Being Perfect"
    and "Working on Yourself Doesn't Work" by Ariel and Shya Kane and try on a fun life
    for yourself.

    4-0 out of 5 stars Short book; potent message
    Anna Quindlen is one of those haunting writers, one who can fool you with a simple, basic cover and an ostensibly simple message. Then, she hits home with poignant views that makes one think, engage in introspection, and question why we do what we do.

    Quindlen has done it again with BEING PERFECT. This little 64 page book extolls the wisdom of avoiding perfectionism, or the perfection trap. She furthers her argument of the dangers of the perfection trap by describing the consequences and the toll it can take on life. She provides answers to the trap, answers that most likely will assuage those habitual perfectionists, as well as the novice. Satisfying oneself is a goal worthy of effort, yet difficult at times to quantify and compose as many perfectionists don't look at finite goals. Consequently, perfectionism can be a slippery slope.

    Quindlen moves ahead of the pack by asking the reader to consider what makes YOU happy, not your friends or family, YOU. This is an underlying message in the book...set goals and objectives in life that create happiness for you. We all have a tendency, at times, do what it takes to make those around us pleased or happy. The problem is simply this: these acts are not necessarily what makes us happy and thus, we are not living our own life.

    Quite honestly, Quindlen has created an essay designed for introspection and enrichment, one that is quite thought-provoking. This is a book that can be read and re-read, and quite quickly. Her message, though short, is quite potent. Recommended. ... Read more

    14. Motivational Interviewing, Second Edition: Preparing People for Change
    by William R. Miller, Stephen Rollnick, Kelly Conforti
    list price: $40.00
    our price: $40.00
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1572305630
    Catlog: Book (2002-04-12)
    Publisher: The Guilford Press
    Sales Rank: 11811
    Average Customer Review: 5 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    Since the initial publication of this breakthrough work, motivational interviewing (MI) has been used by countless clinicians. Theory and methods have evolved apace, reflecting new knowledge on the process of behavior change, a growing body of outcome research, and the development of new applications within and beyond the addictions field. Extensively rewritten, this revised and expanded second edition now brings MI practitioners and trainees fully up to date. William R. Miller and Stephen Rollnick explain how to work through ambivalence to facilitate change, present detailed guidelines for using their approach, and reflect on the process of learning MI. Chapters contributed by other leading experts then address such special topics as MI and the stages-of-change model, applications in medical, public health, and criminal justice settings, and using the approach with groups, couples, and adolescents.

    ... Read more

    Reviews (2)

    5-0 out of 5 stars A new classic
    If change were easy, a lot of us (psychologists, counselors, health care providers) would be out of work. Still, that doesn't stop us from complaining about those clients and patients who just won't do what we think is in their best interest. Motivational Interviewing, a "client-centered, directive method for enhancing intrinsic motivation," was developed specifically to help faciliate change in "resistant" populations and has been embraced by addictions treatment and general health care professionals alike. The entirely re-written, highly readable, second edition of MOTIVATIONAL INTERVIEWING updates readers on the state of the art and science of MI, and provides a practical guide for helping people to make all kinds of behavior changes.

    The book opens with a brief review of the converging lines of inquiry that supported the development of MI and an overview of core concepts such as readiness to change, ambivalence, and an interpersonally-based understanding of motivation. The second section is a guide to practice. While "spirit" is emphasized over technique, this section is filled with practical advice on how to increase motivation for change while minimizing resistance. A new chapter on ethics addresses the concerns that arise when attempting to motivate clients to do something they aren't sure they want to do. Consistent with the method's client-centered approach, the third section constitutes a chapter on learner-centered training in MI. The fourth section - comprising about half the volume - includes diverse contributed chapters on applications of MI. These include a discussion of MI and the Stages of Change model with which it is often associated; an excellent review of efficacy research in MI; adaptations of MI such as brief advice and MI with couples or groups; and applications with specific populations and settings. The application chapters necessarily vary in format but share in common careful consideration of the rationale for MI in the particular setting and the available evidence for success along with offering clinical wisdom from the field.

    The first edition of Motivational Interviewing has become a modern classic in the field, and the second edition is a worthy successor. Whereas the first edition presented MI as an alternative to traditional approaches to treating addictions, the second edition presents MI as an approach to helping people get "unstuck" regardless of the kind of behavior change in question. The key principles are more fully thought out, yet streamlined and presented in an almost conversational tone. The humanistic values that underlie MI are more consistently evident, yet the dedication to empirical validation of clinical insights remains. There is enough new material to justify buying this book even if you already have the first edition. - reviewed by Deborah Van Horn - first posted 5/16/02, updated 5/18/04.

    5-0 out of 5 stars An Essential Guide to Exploring and Resolving Ambivalence
    When do you use a Motivational Interviewing approach? Whenever there is ambivalence for change. How often does ambivalence for change occur? At almost any time people are considering some kind of change. In this 2nd edition of Motivational Interviewing, the authors are very clear that MI is not an approach that obviates the use of other therapy approaches, such as CBT, but is an approach that prepares people for change.

    I have been a trainer in Motivational Interviewing since 1995 (see and am privileged to have received my training from the authors, Drs. Miller and Rollnick. The first edition, Motivational Interviewing, Preparing People to Change Addictive Behavior, provided information that has helped many professionals working in addictions a way to more effectively engage clients in the process of change. The 2nd edition is written so that professionals working with clients around any issues...mental health, health behavior, addictions, health promotion, life coaching...are able to apply the methods for exploring and resolving ambivalence for change.

    The first three chapters of the book set the stage for understanding the nature of change and ambivalence for change so that the reader is more fully prepared to understand the value of fully understanding the client situation and eliciting desire, ability, reasons, need and committment for change from the client. This approach differs from the often tendency to understand the client's situation and then in a well meaning way, prescribe the needed steps for change. The strategies for interacting with clients via the use of open ended questions and the use of reflective responses is clearly discussed. Methods for eliciting change talk and responding to the concept of resistance are easily understood and examples are provided that will assist readers in considering how this approach will fit into their unique situations.

    Of great value to me has been the expanded view of the concept of client resistance. From the MI approach, resistance is seen as occuring in context and is conceived of as dissonance...just a lack of harmony, or being on the same page together. When viewed in this way, it just signals the professional that another approach is needed. How to 'roll with resistance' is then illustrated very clearly.

    This edition of Motivational Interviewing has expanded my ability to provide training. Even more importantly, the emphasis of this edition has underscored even more for me,that in my provision of psychotherapy, MI is not an approach to be pulled out for special occasions but is the treatment philosophy from which I approach all clients, despite the particular therapy modality utilized in the specific work. ... Read more

    15. Boundaries
    by Henry Cloud
    list price: $14.99
    our price: $10.19
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0310247454
    Catlog: Book (2002-04-01)
    Publisher: Zondervan Publishing Company
    Sales Rank: 1418
    Average Customer Review: 4.21 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us, mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts, emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own. ... Read more

    Reviews (101)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Turning my life around
    As a Christian, I continually struggled with feeling depressed from being a doormat, and being nice because it was "part of the abundant Christian life." Everyone spoke about Christianity as being a joyful, full life that I would love and never want to return to the secular world. Then why did I feel so miserable? Why did the secular world seem so appealing, where I could be as nasty and selfish as I wanted to?

    The answer was in "Boundaries". As I read the book, I could identify with something in every chapter. I'm the type of person who will let everyone else step all over me to keep themselves happy. As long as I didn't raise a ruckus, and the peace was kept, everything was okay, right? WRONG! Inside I was always seething with anger, and I was livid with the fact that I had to continually step out of the way for everyone else while they ran right over me.

    Through reading this book, I realized that it's OK to set boundaries in all interactions; in fact, I now believe that it would be wrong NOT to set boundaries in things. Slowly but surely, with the help from this book's message, I've been setting boundaries for a happier life that's filled with more peace, joy, and abundance than ever.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent Self-Help Guide for men & women of all ages
    I found Boundaries to be extremely helpful to me and my family. The authors point to Biblical references for boundary development & enforcement. The authors also illustrate real-life examples of people who have boundary issues and give practical advice on how to resolve conflicts in all relationships...parent-child, spouse-spouse, friend-friend, etc. I firmly believe that this book is vital for people who desire to have Godly, healthy relationships. When my children are mature enough to read & understand this book, I will definitely encourage them to read it. I believe that it will be helpful for my children as they prepare for adulthood and also as they begin searching for a mate. I highly recommend this book for everyone who is in the midst of relationship trials & tribulations.

    5-0 out of 5 stars EXCELLENT!
    This book gives one the TOOLS to build healthy boundaries. It's a virtual Home Depot of psychology and living.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A great guide to understanding and applying boundaries
    This book provided a clear and thourough exploration into the concept of boundaries. As a former member of a christian cult I found it a very helpful guide in healing and re-learning the concept of setting biblical boundaries. Many religions (and people in general) may be threatened by this concept because of their need to control others. Even if you do not consider yourself religious this book is a good guide for anyone who needs to understand and apply the concept of boundaries in their life.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent even with the "god" stuff
    This book dramatically changed my life and I only made it through chapter 5. I have since recommended it to many people that are looking to actively make positive changes in their lives. This book is obviously written for Christians but it is great for the non-believer as well. I'm an atheist and I just skipped over the religious dialogue and made parallels as best I could.

    They treat self-help as it should be treated. There are no "victims" in this book and no blame shifting. The authors make a strong point that change must come from within and only with strong personal conviction and action is it going to happen. Very powerful read. ... Read more

    16. Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
    by Irvin D. Yalom
    list price: $56.00
    our price: $56.00
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0465084486
    Catlog: Book (1995-01-15)
    Publisher: Basic Books
    Sales Rank: 6527
    Average Customer Review: 4.64 out of 5 stars
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    Book Description

    This monumental work by the world's best known group therapy theoretician and practitioner has long been the standard text in the field. ... Read more

    Reviews (14)

    5-0 out of 5 stars The Master Of Group Therapy
    Yalom's revolutionary book, The Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy, is essential reading for the graduate student in therapy and counseling. It provides a comprehensive guide to the group experience, from the beginning to the end, and everywhere in between. It includes how one would create a group, problems to expect, and practical solutions to these problems. The book does not read as a typical textbook, but as a novel. The author's style is informative, but not laden with academic jargon. The high readability is also due to the fact that Yalom includes real-life examples throughout the entire book. This helps the reader to apply theory to situations that will be encountered in the course of conducting group therapy. Each chapter is outlined explicitly, which helps with future referencing. The most practical knowledge gained from reading this book is the emphasis the author places on the here-and-now process of group therapy. This is an aspect often overlooked by new group therapists. The explanation of group process demystifies the group experience and explains how it is that groups are beneficial to the members participating in them. This book is also practical in that it gives an explanation of all possible pitfalls encountered in the group setting, including problem patients and attrition in the group. The author helps the reader to know what to expect and how to handle problems when they arise. While this book was an extraordinary guide to the group experience, there were a few shortcomings. First of all, the book was based on outpatient groups Yalom lead at Stanford, which might not be applicable to all of the population. The reader is advised to take this into account when reading the book. Also, the groups were all long-term, sometimes lasting several years. In reality, this may not be a practical occurrence, as therapists may have trouble finding members that will commit themselves to such a long-term group. There were two major aspects of group therapy that needed more attention in this book. First of all, cross-cultural issues were not discussed in this book. This is an extremely important aspect of all therapy, and it was not addressed here. It is questionable that all of the results presented in this book would apply to multi-cultural situations. In addition, brief therapy groups were rarely mentioned in this book. In reality, therapists will probably conduct homogeneous brief therapy groups much more often in the course of their careers. The author included a chapter on the encounter group that was so popular in previous decades but is rarely used anymore. It would have been more fruitful to address the brief therapy group and omit the encounter group. Despite these shortcomings, this book is of extreme value to the new therapist. It includes the group in all aspects, and answers readers' questions before they are even asked. It should be mandatory reading material for all graduate students before they lead their first groups.

    5-0 out of 5 stars The Master of Group Psychotherapy
    Yalom's revolutionary book is essential reading for the graduate student in counseling. It provides a comprehenive guide to the group experience, form the beginning to the end, and everywhere in between. It includes how one would create a group, problems to expect and practical solutions to these problems. The book does not read as a typical textbook, but as a novel.The authors style is informative but not laden with jargon. The high readability is also due to the fact that Yalom includes real-life examples throughout the entire book. This helps the reader to apply theory to situations that will be encountered in the course of conducting group therapy. Each chapter is outlined explicitly, which helps with future referencing. The most practical knowledge gained from reading this book is the emphasis on the here and now process of group therapy. This is an aspect often overlooked by new group therapist. The explanation of group process demystifies the group experience and explains how groups are beneficial to the members participating in them. This book is also practical in that it gives an explanation of all possible pitfalls encountered in the group setting, including problem patients and attrition in the group. The author helps the reader to know what to expect and how to handle problems when they arise. While this book was an extraordinary guide to the group experience, there were a few shortcomings. First of all, the book was based on outpatient groups that Yalom led and supervised at Stanford University, which might not be applicable to all of the population. The reader is advised to take this into account when reading the book. Also, the groups were all long-term, sometimes lasting several years. In reality, this may not be a practical occurrence, as therapist may have trouble finding members that will commit themselves to such a long term group. There were two major aspects of group therapy that needed more attention in the book. First, cross cultural issues were not discussed. This is an extremely iimportant aspect of all therapy, and it was not addressed here. It is questionable that all the results presented in this book would apply to multi-cultural situations. In addition, brief therapy groups were rarely mentioned in this book. in reality, therapists will probably conduct homogeneous brief therapy groups much more often in the course of their careers. The author included a chapter on the encounter group that was popular in previous decades but is rarely used anymore. It would have been more fruitful to address the brief therapy group and omit the encoounter group. Despite these shortcomings, this book is of extreme value to the new therapist. It includes all aspects of group behaviior and answers the readers' questions before the are even asked. It should be mandatory reading material for all graduate students before they lead their first groups.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A Very Simple Review
    Nobody should do group psychotherapy without reading this book.

    4-0 out of 5 stars A very informative book
    I am currently using this for class and it is a very good book. Yalom, explains the process of group work and what aspect of the process works and what doesn't. You will be able to use what you read in this book with your own groups. Expects some laughs because there's a lot of humor also. You won't be bored.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A Veritable Masterpiece!
    Dr. Yalom's book is not only a veritable masterpiece, but a tour de force that deals with everything you ever wanted to know about group psychotherapy.

    Comprehensive without being pedantic, thorough without being dense, Dr. Yalom puts the group process under a magnifying glass and, in straightforward easy-to-understand language and conceptualization, gently guides the student through all of the subtlties and nuances of group work.

    I had to purchase this book for use as the main text in a group process course, but this book will remain on my shelf long after I have taken the course. Dr. Yalom's keen insight into not just how/why groups behave and function the way they do, but also his insight into basic human nature, has made this book very enjoyable as well as educational. ... Read more

    17. The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond
    by Patricia Evans
    list price: $10.95
    our price: $8.21
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 1558505822
    Catlog: Book (1996-03-01)
    Publisher: Adams Media Corporation
    Sales Rank: 1639
    Average Customer Review: 4.24 out of 5 stars
    US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan

    Are you now, or have you ever been, in relationships with family, friends, or mates who have been verbally abusive? Is your happiness with someone you love continually threatened byinteractionsthat continually undermine your self-esteem? Do you feel trapped in a relationship that keeps decaying in a downward spiral of overt or passive-aggressive abuse?

    If so, this book could be your life raft, either carrying you toward repair of the existing relationship or the effects of past relationships or offering liberation from your current confusion. Its practical approach can help clear your head and possibly change your life. The only criticism that I and other readers have is that the author assumes verbal abuse is almost always directed by males toward females, which, in my experience and that of others I know, is not necessarily the case. Highly Recommended. ... Read more

    Reviews (153)

    5-0 out of 5 stars A time-tested landmark book on verbal abuse.
    As a criminal prosecutor with 15 years of experience, having worked on numerous domestic violence cases ranging from assault to intentional murder, I found Patricia Evan's book, The Verbally Abusive Relationship to be a revolutionary, definitive, and validating text on the subject of verbally abusive relationships. Revolutionary, because it seeks to shed light on one of our cultures long-ignored social taboos. Definitive, because it puts words to concepts whose dialogue was previously muted by a lack of community awareness and common language. And finally, validating for those who have suffered in the cruel isolation created through verbal abuse and controlling behaviors. If you are a reader looking for a legitimate starting point on the subject of verbal abuse, Patricia Evan's book, The Verbally Abusive Relationship, is the place to start.

    The Verbally Abusive Relationship is not advocacy, but rather presents an education in recognizing, and contending with, verbally abusive behaviors. The Verbally Abusive Relationship begins by defining varying realities, and the role these realities play in verbally abusive relationships. In addition to introducing the reader to new concepts and vocabulary in a world of dysfunctional interpersonal communication, Patricia Evans goes on to provide essential information necessary for recognizing and ultimately surviving, the destructive effects that come from living in a relationship filled with verbal abuse.

    The Verbally Abusive Relationship is an empowering book for those who have suffered from the abuse of controlling partners. But, like any written work whose contents threaten to undermine the demented power of those who have chosen, through abuse, to subjugate their partner, this book will draw detractors. After more that a decade in publication, The Verbally Abusive Relationship's success and truth can be measured in lives saved, or detractor's protests. Either way, it presents a truth that is disempowering to abusers, and empowering to victims of verbal abuse.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A MUST READ!
    Patricia Evan's book "The Verbally Abusive Relationship", is an absolute must read for men and women. I initially bought and read the book as research for a psycholinguistic paper explaining the effects of verbal abuse. Never did I imagine it would open my eyes and give me such incredible empowering tools. After reading this book, I can now recognize when I am being discounted, diminished, and countered and respond appropriately with positive and empowering assertion. This book goes beyond helping just relationships at home, it easily helps an abused person understand and deal with abusive employers (whether male or female), verbal abusive merchants, or anyone else that may intimidate and/or control by verbally abusing others. The fact that men are more often portrayed as abusers in the book should not discourage either gender from reading and heeding the words on the pages. The reality is more women are abused by men than men by women. However, an abused male reader can simply exchange "female" for "male" and reap the same benefits as female readers. Anyone that feels, suspects, or knows that they are verbally abused should read this book NOW!

    2-0 out of 5 stars Not For Christians
    As a Christian woman, I can tell you this book helped me identify that my husband's behavior had nothing to do with submission, but was/is verbally abusive. But that is the only good that came out of the book.

    Because she seemed to have some sort of insight to what I was experiencing, I felt I would be able to get further advice on how I as a Christian could get help and/or support. I quickly found out that there is no other way but her way.

    She addresses control in her book and identifies control as an abusive tactic. What I find interesting is that she exhibits control amongst those that accept her ideals set forth in her book. An example being, when a negative review shows up here, she goes to her bulletin board, requesting her posters to post positive reviews, which in other cases that do not pertain to her, she would label as manipulative.

    She and her followers believe that the abused, because they have been abused, have a special license to be offending and in fact may be abusive to others, because they are victims and should be understood. They will emphatically deny that abusers can change. Although the odds are slim, some abusers have changed.

    I would strongly recommend that no Christian read this book. It appears innocent enough on the surface, but once you begin to delve deeper, you will find that she, her following and ideals set forth is cult-like in nature. No other views are accepted, but labeled as abusive and slowly the attempt is to brainwash the reader.

    1-0 out of 5 stars Bad Advice
    Evans' advice to tell your abuser to "STOP IT!" is laughable. As a woman who has had years of experience dealing with a verbally abusive husband, I can tell you this will NOT help matters. If it makes you feel better, by all means, go ahead - but don't be surprised if you end up with another nasty fight on your hands and feeling worse.
    Great book for women who just want to feel justified in getting a divorce. If you want actual SOLUTIONS, I highly recommend "You can't say that to me" by Suzette Elgin.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Crystalizes ungraspable experiences
    Pick up this book if dealing with your partner brings up feelings of your ineptness in his/her eyes, invalidation, FEAR, oppression, disenfranchisement to feel your feelings, a sense that you're a nuissance to your partner, or you feel stripped of your confidence and sense of self worth. Verbal abuse is not only overt, but covert which can be most damaging due to its insidious nature. If you're having feelings which you can't name, but are signals that somehow something is destroying your sense of wholeness as a person - pick up this book. It will help you name the feelings whose identities escape you. But, do pick up complementary books as this one serves to "identify" and not so much give explanations. ... Read more

    18. An Unquiet Mind : A Memoir of Moods and Madness
    list price: $12.95
    our price: $9.71
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0679763309
    Catlog: Book (1997-01-14)
    Publisher: Vintage
    Sales Rank: 1195
    Average Customer Review: 4.35 out of 5 stars
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    In Touched with Fire, Kay Redfield Jamison, a psychiatrist, turned a mirror on the creativity so often associated with mental illness. In this book she turns that mirror on herself. With breathtaking honesty she tells of her own manic depression, the bitter costs of her illness, and its paradoxical benefits: "There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness and terror involved in this kind of madness.... It will never end, for madness carves its own reality." This is one of the best scientific autobiographies ever written, a combination of clarity, truth, and insight into human character. "We are all, as Byron put it, differently organized," Jamison writes. "We each move within the restraints of our temperament and live up only partially to its possibilities." Jamison's ability to live fully within her limitations is an inspiration to her fellow mortals, whatever our particular burdens may be. --Mary Ellen Curtin ... Read more

    Reviews (207)

    5-0 out of 5 stars Invaluable
    Scouring the bookshelves for something, anything regarding the topic of bipolar illness, I came across Dr. Jamison's brilliant memoir. I had recently been diagnosed with rapid cycling bipolar and was unsure of how that would effect my life. I had always been moody and eccentric, how would I learn to live without those highs? How would I get used to losing the endless nights of various projects and explorations. Everything is brighter when you're manic and everything is more enjoyable. Surely I could endure the depressions just to experience the highs. However, when I read Dr. Jamison's book I saw myself reflected in the pages. Things escalate when you're bipolar, and much of the time you have no idea what you are doing or how you appear to others. Dr. Jamison describes the mania with precision. Her words are chilling to the reader who knows exactly what a manic episode is like. She is also very firm in her standing on treatment for bipolars. She advocates a combined approach of psychotherapy and medication. Her arguments are solid and helpful for the family and friends of a person living with bipolar. The novel is well written, informative, and enjoyable. I am filled with awe for Dr. Jamison because she has done so much for those of us living with bipolar disorder. She has inspired me personally because she is such a brilliant woman. This memoir belongs on everyone's shelf who is interested or involved in bipolar disorder.

    3-0 out of 5 stars painless, not perceptive
    Okay, now let's see. Jamison is blessed with a hyperintelligent, loving family, wonderful colleagues, supportive boyfriends, and amazing doctors. As someone with bipolar, who has none of the above, I found it hard to relate to her memoir. Most people I know with mental illness, despite their innate gifts, are not so lucky. Indeed most people I know without mental illness aren't as lucky either.

    As a result of bestowing three to five complimentary adjectives upon most of the characters and glossing over the few painful interactions included, Jamison's book comes off like a Disney World version of manic depression. Indeed it is courageous of her to "come out" like this only if things really aren't as wonderful as she's presented them here.

    Tracy Thompson's and Martha Manning's memoirs of depression do a much better job of portraying the pain and frustration of a mood disorder, and were a lot more honest and well-written. AUM does have some evocative descriptions, but look elsewhere for stunning insights and carefully crafted prose.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent Account
    <br /> <br /> Having dealt most of my life with Manic-Depression, this is one of the better books to read, both from the Doctor's point of view as well as one that is living with the situation. I wish it would have touched a little more on the why it happens but thankfully there are several boos out there that explain the why's such as: <br /> Skywriting, Brilliant Madness and Nightmares Echo.

    5-0 out of 5 stars A found mind.....
    I am a 26 yr old woman that has only six months ago been diagnoised with bi-polor...this book was amazing. So many of the same things that Kay speaks of I feel- deeply. My therapist told me to go through and hi-lite all the things that really touch home with me...most of the book is now has allowed me another way to talk with my family and friends about all of the issues and obstacles I have faced and struggled with. I recommend this book to anyone that has a family member that has been diagnoised or a close friend. Or if you think you may have some of the symptoms of bi-polor.
    It's hard to reach for help if you are bi-polor especially if your feels really good - but read and look at the reality of not getting help....

    5-0 out of 5 stars Inspiring.
    This book is wonderfully written. A great read for anybody interested in, or suffering from Bipolar. ... Read more

    19. Skills Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality Disorder
    by Marsha M. Linehan
    list price: $34.00
    our price: $34.00
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0898620341
    Catlog: Book (1993-05-21)
    Publisher: The Guilford Press
    Sales Rank: 5912
    Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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    Reviews (26)

    5-0 out of 5 stars I'm a survivor, nothing much has worked until
    After over thirty years of intense therapy for serious childhood abuse after-effects, this book and DBT in particular, has truly made my life worth living.
    I am a textbook case of abuse survivors, with all the symptoms and a borderline diagnosis too. Treatment of my condition (severe depression,anxiety,PTSD and major distrust of people)has become possible. I didn't think it would ever happen..but this book and therapy together has actually made it possible for me to cope much better, actually feel happy at times, and "unfreeze" me (I stayed home a lot and didn't want to go out, before, due to fear), now I go out and see myself growing every day..
    I also go to a therapy group that helps teach this book in more detail (DBT skills), if there's one in your area and you have severe problems with depression/anger/fear it is worth your while to check it out because very little has worked on me..until now. Thank you, Marsha Linehan!

    5-0 out of 5 stars Great book....for anyone
    I'm a psychology intern and we use this manual for multiple disorders, not just BPD. The skills, as others have suggested are essential to living a healthy, happy life, regardless of one's 'problems.' While most modern day psychotherapeutic techniques preach change, Linehan's work centers on centering. Acceptance balanced with change. Emotion balanced with logic. It's a wonderful new perspective on treating psychological disorders. And as an added bonus, in the age of managed care, it's one of the few treatments rooted in a humanistic understanding that will be readily reimbursed by HMO's. As both a therapist and a consumer of psychological literature, this work stands as one of the most helpful available. Well worth the money. And you can make copies of the handouts WITHOUT worrying about copyright infringement because the author has graciously given permission to do so. Linehan is really an asset to the psychological community.

    4-0 out of 5 stars Highly helpful for high functioning, motivated borderlines
    This manual is highly effective for treating higher intellectually functioning and reasonably motivated borderlines. The handouts are especially helpful and they help to present the treatment in methods presentable to many clients (although I have found some borderlines become overly dependent on the handouts and conversely develop compulsions and obsessions centered around their DBT handouts and journals). I work in a residential treatment facility for SPMI (all clients also have at least one Axis I diagnosis), and most of our clients have too low intellectual functioning to grasp many of the DBT concepts. I especially enjoy the Zen focus of Linehan's DBT.

    5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent
    I'm the webowner of BPD Today and this is the "handbook" someone would bring to their dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) sessions as this form of therapy has shown in studies to help some folks with BPD. The material alone is excellent and one can get a lot of help with this very painful disorder. Every home with BPD should have it.

    5-0 out of 5 stars -
    Looks like 'a reader from Mesa, AZ'- needs to utilize "non-judgemental stance" a little more effectively. ; p ... Read more

    20. Approval Addiction : Overcoming Your Need to Please Everyone
    by Joyce Meyer
    list price: $22.99
    our price: $15.63
    (price subject to change: see help)
    Asin: 0446577723
    Catlog: Book (2005-04-05)
    Publisher: Joyce Meyer Trade
    Sales Rank: 710
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    Book Description

    Bestselling author Joyce Meyer confronts the need for approval that is so evident in today’s world.

    So many people these days have an unhealthy need for constant affirmation and are unable to feel good about themselves without it. Thiscan lead to major problems in relationships and may even turn into an addiction. In her latest book, Joyce Meyer provides a release from the need for acceptance from the outside world--an acceptancethat is unfulfilling and leads only to disappointment. She provides a supportive voice that understands the effect of insecurity in one’s life. Her abiding message is that God provides all the security one needs, and through Him one can attain freedom from the approval addiction. ... Read more

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